A Place Within Strangers
by BVtBear
Summary: Final Chapter up.
1. Part One: Heart

*Author's Note: I've been wanting to write this story for a while now, and I've finally had the chance to do it. It's basically how Bra came to be, but it's unique. I hope you guys enjoy this, it's one of my last. Any comments, good or bad, are welcome.  
BVtBear  
  
Disclaimer: I do not own or make a profit of the DBZ franchise. I do believe that the honor of creating such a show, manga, etc. is of Akira Toriyama. DBZ is a trademark of TOEI Animation (says on the label of DBZ videos) and licensed by FUNimation. So from all that legal stuff, you can conclude that I DO NOT own this stuff....I just get a kick of out using their characters for entertainment purposes. So please, do not sue.  
  
___________________________  
  
~ To those who are always there and to those who aren't.  
And to Fusion, who has mastered both. ~  
  
____________________________  
  
* Ye took me in, but I was not naked.  
I took you in, because you were foolish.  
Ye never knew me, but I knew you.  
  
Mistakes of the Past  
  
She knew him, at least more than everyone else did. She could tell when he was angry or confused and she had learned to read his eyes instead of his face.  
  
He liked to hide things. He didn't always mean to; it's just the way he was. And she knew his potential, sometimes even feared it. When she was scared or pensive, she thought of the years before, wondering if he'd ever return to the way he used to be and re-embrace his darkness. Wondering if she'd see that carnal look in his eyes when he has thoughtlessly destroyed lives. It's been burned into her mind, and she will forever fear it.  
  
But...time has passed, and although she feels like she knows him again, she realizes that she really doesn't. And never will.  
  
_____  
  
She stood outside, withstanding the cold air beating against her skin. She was too deep in thought to notice as her vision focused solely on the metal dome across the yard.  
  
She told him the cowards' way; knocked on his door- which he begrudgingly opened- stood nervously by the control panel, and then blurted it out. She didn't even give him a chance to react; she simply ran away afterwards.  
  
He didn't follow her and she knew he wouldn't. They both needed time to think. But it was the best thing to do, giving him time to...adjust. She didn't believe Vegeta to be irrational. No, he was always in control. She just believed that if he was alone, he could consider what he wanted to say- if he said anything at all.  
  
She heard the door snap shut and cursed herself for being lost in thought again. She was so deep in her own dread that she didn't even notice the GR's lights had disappeared and he had since entered the house.  
  
'I will not show my fear. I will look him in the eye and have a serious discussion with this man.'  
  
But as he stood before her, her resolution dissolved.  
  
He eyed her steadily, his dark orbs unwavering. He looked impatient- or maybe a little bothered- and his imprinted scowl did not bring her any hope.  
  
She swallowed audibly but refused to look away. Instead, she stared back, wishing someone would run through the room screaming in agony so they would be distracted from this uneasy dilemma. It was now or never, and with Vegeta, never can be a long, long time.  
  
"I'm having this baby, Vegeta."  
  
He stiffened and his eyes widened just a little.  
  
"What makes you think you have a choice?"  
  
It was her turn to act surprised, and unknowingly, she began to shake.  
  
"It's-it's our... child."  
  
He nodded briefly before opening his mouth to speak. He paused to consider before reopening his mouth to give his verdict.  
  
One word:  
  
"Fine."  
  
Her body became rigid and she stood there gaping. He said nothing more and turned away to shower.  
  
___________  
  
'What made her think I wanted to kill my own flesh and blood? During Frieza's rule, I might have given it consideration but there's no reason for it now. The woman wants more children, fine, let her take care of them. Besides Trunks' training, that woman has given the boy everything he needed, and he has turned out... alright.'  
  
What exactly did she expect from him? A bloody murder, where he would just storm in and rip the child from her gut? He was surprised it hadn't cross his mind....but in a manner, relieved. He wasn't who he used to be.  
  
Yes, times had changed. They had changed her, changed him, and he had noticed a change in everyone, from his own son to his rival. But she was uneasy, perhaps unsure, of what he would do.  
  
And that bothered him.  
  
Didn't she know him after all these years? Didn't she know him enough to not be afraid? All those years should at least count for something, and yet the woman still trembled to hear him speak. It sickened him. But most of all, it made him sad. The woman had lost trust in him and it had yet to be regained. He did not want to think that all those years were a waste of time.  
  
_____  
  
She was curled up in bed with sheets draped barely over her legs. He knew she wasn't asleep- her breathing was too labored.  
  
What was he to her, an animal? Was he that terrifying that she had to play dead so he could come, sniff her, and then find fresher prey? He had to believe it was only because she was bearing and the current situation between them was obviously new to him.  
  
"I know you're not sleeping." He grunted out as he pulled back the covers and climbed into the bed.  
  
"I know."  
  
They lay in awkward silence for what seemed like hours. Eventually, she spoke, although she did not turn to face him.  
  
"Do you want this child?" She whispered.  
  
"It wouldn't exist if I hadn't allowed it."  
  
She turned to face him, trying to read his eyes. She knew he was telling the truth.  
  
"How?"  
  
"I can smell when you're in season. I knew when you were viable to conceive."  
  
He knew she wanted to know why. But not just why he allowed this to happen, but why he did what he did so long ago. She wanted to know why he allowed himself to fall under control of the wizard, and later killed himself when Majin Buu opposed the existence of the Earth.  
  
They never spoke of it. He knew she was scared of the answer- the skepticism made it obvious she didn't believe what he had just told her- and she probably thought it was all a carefully thought-out plan; to get her pregnant just to prove he was still a decent man.  
  
But he didn't need to prove anything. The solution was simple:  
  
He fell under control because he wanted something he no longer needed and then killed himself because what he needed was in danger.  
  
So why couldn't he just tell her that?  
  
But nothing was simple to Vegeta, except battle, where his pride was still strong and burned permanently in his heart. It was one of the fundamental structures of his being, and if he allowed that structure to become weak, he would collapse like an old building that never belonged in this time. He would simply fall and become buried under the rubble. And it seemed that no matter how much the woman dug, she would never find him, and if she happened to find him, he would never be the same anyway.  
  
But the woman wanted to know and he knew it was important that she did. He remembered, his return from demise, and how she treated him- she still wanted him and was happy with his return, she just wasn't comfortable with it. How do you return to normality when the person you thought you could trust broke away and did the unexpected? When they no longer accepted the rules?  
  
But it was simply that he grew tired of running his cycle- to train so he could beat a fool and prove to himself he deserved the title of Saiyan no Ouji. He grew tired of being called the strongest on Earth, only because the clown was in Other World. It was false, unreal, and frustrating, and the only way to give truth to those fraudulent words was to have Kakarrot's blood spill over the Earth herself. But retribution crashed as always and this time, he knew it sooner than usual- he figured it out before they even fought- as he witnessed Kakarrot's fights with others and saw how powerful that fool had really become.  
  
It taunted him. The idea of defeat, facing loss once again, and having to live with it. Maybe he could have lived with it, if he had been alone. But he wasn't anymore and he wasn't dealing with only himself. He was surrounded with people, with a family, and the idea of having to face them was unbearable, the ultimate humiliation, and it had to be prevented at all costs.  
  
So in turn, he broke the rules, destroyed anything that connected him to anyone, and fell into the taste of power that felt so old....like victories of the past.  
  
_____  
  
He was thinking to himself again. She noticed the faraway look in his eyes- indicating that he was no longer in this reality. She wondered if this had been well thought-out, if he had articulately planned everything with every single detail accounted for. He was a tactician in battle, who said those talents couldn't be used elsewhere?  
  
She wanted this child. But she wanted to know that he wanted it too. A child shouldn't be an action of battle; it shouldn't exist if its only purpose is to convince her of his nobility. And it couldn't be an accident either. There were no slip ups in his life, everything happened because it was supposed to...except for failure. And maybe he considered this one of his failures...but, she didn't want to think that. She didn't want to think that what he felt for this child could be the same as what he first felt for Trunks.  
  
She knew he was different, but he gradually changed. It took years in which good crept into him inch by inch- and she was the one who led him. But he broke off and ran away, only to return a changed man. Some things were the alike, but she was no longer as accustomed with the core of his being. Like your old childhood home, it's familiar, but it's not the same.  
  
She realized the stillness had gone on long enough and decided to ask one question before the night ended in silence. Hopefully, if she found an answer to anything, it would be this.  
  
"Who are you?"  
  
He was jolted back from his thoughts by a trivial question. But as the meaning dawned on him, he couldn't help but to give a bitter laugh.  
  
"I wouldn't be here if I knew."  
  
Tears jumped to her eyes and she looked away.  
  
He hadn't meant to say that. Perhaps, in a way, he did. But he hadn't meant to hurt her. At least that he was sure of. But who was he?  
  
"What I use to be no longer exists."  
  
She looked back with damp cheeks, hastily brushing tears away with the back of her hand. "We're all someone, Vegeta....we all mean something to somebody." The words came out softly, as if to save him from having to respond.  
  
"Who am I? I am the ruler of a non-existing race, bettered by a man who grew up with none of the hardships I endured. Hardships I suffered and fought through to someday reclaim my race and take my place amongst the Legendary Super Saiyans, and instead had to watch him take what was mine. And I am the man who stupidly thought he would learn the secret to a fool's success and found out that the answer was one he did not want to learn. And why?"  
  
He laughed cynically, the torment evident in his eyes. "Because the answer is love! Love! The fool loved everyone and therefore knew his enemy and could defeat them...and so he knew and... loved me!" He exclaimed furiously.  
  
He had realized such a thing long ago; it was an epiphany he had locked away in his mind. That last thing he wanted to do was to discuss it, but he found no other way to inform the woman of the misery of his past.  
  
"He found my weakness, twisted it to what he wanted it, and defeated me!" He looked down, griping the bed-sheets through his fingers. "I loathed him, I detested him, I wanted his blood to soak the ground and seep to the bowels of hell, where he could rot for eternity." His face grew sour, and he closed his eyes, taking deep breaths. "And when Buu came along...I knew- I knew of the danger. And I would not allow Kakarrot take what was rightfully mine. I would win that battle and prove that my method could bring victory as well. So I took the challenge and fought that stupid thing. But it slowly became clear that I was no match, and if it got past me this world would be destroyed."  
  
He opened his eyes and stared ahead, almost losing himself in memories.  
  
"...And I knew he would get you."  
  
He closed his eyes again, his breathing difficult, but subdued. "I realized Kakarrot was right, I had been fighting the wrong way the entire time. And because of my ignorance and refusal to accept the truth, I was the one to blame when Buu went on a killing spree. Do you know what that makes me?"  
  
He turned to her with sullen eyes and a tired face. "A failure."  
  
She sobbed loudly, muffling her tears when she buried her face in her hands.  
  
'Oh, Vegeta. Please do not tell me this is the way you've felt for years. Tell me you haven't suffered this for years. I thought there was some peace within you. Something...'  
  
"Vegeta," She cried, squeezing her eyes shut. "Is there something I'm supposed to say? I just-I don't know what to do! Why didn't you say anything?!"  
  
He wanted to leave, walk right out that door and let her cry herself to sleep. He had let this go too far, but....he couldn't avoid it. He was tired of talking and dwelling in the past. She was pregnant. That was it. He no longer cared. He should just let her know the truth and get it over with. He wanted to let her know in his own cryptic way that he wanted this child as much as she did. Once she understood that, then he could store this memory far, far back where he wouldn't have the need to retrieve it. Until then, he had to wait this out, until she was satisfied with his answers and could bring peace to herself.  
  
He looked over to her. To his surprise, she was staring right back. She closed her eyes for a moment, allowing more tears to escape, and sighed.  
  
She shifted, moving toward the weary Saiyan. He didn't retreat or prevent her from getting closer, he simply sat there and waited for her to do whatever she wanted to do. If she wanted to slap him, fine. If she wanted to embrace him tightly, that was fine too. Just as long as she did something.  
  
She kissed him.  
  
One small, tender, embarrassing kiss, forehead resting against his heavily, thumb tracing lightly along his jaw. She pulled back with a small sniff, her blue eyes staring at him sadly, giving him a jaded smile.  
  
"Vegeta, how long will you live a life that you weren't meant to live? I tried to live a life that wasn't meant for me. I wanted something from a fairytale, along with the perfect man. Why do you think Goku is so happy?" She sniffed again, wiping her eyes. "He lives for others. And no one else."  
  
He stared at her. Stared deeply at her saddened face, how she looked so depressed yet more at peace than ever. He wondered if it was the face of acceptance or resignation. He decided it was neither.  
  
"It's time," she continued quietly. "that we no longer live our separate, but overlapping lives. I think- I think we need to create our own. Together. As it should have been before." She gazed at him. "Our existence is one. And whatever happened before we were together.... That is in the past. And the past just prepared us to be who we needed to be for each other." She leaned back in, placing a simple kiss on his cheek. She lingered and whispered into his ear: "So when will you let me be there for you?"  
  
He didn't feel like talking anymore. Instead, he placed her back down on the bed and pulled the sheets up to her body. With a quick tap, she was asleep, never noticing that he had hit a pressure point.  
  
He sighed. "I don't know."  
  
___________  
  
The first time, she had been alone, but it hadn't been his fault. It had been a mutual understanding, and neither had expected it to happen in the first place. Their relationship back then had been passionate and frenzied- they hadn't paid attention to their actions or the consequences. And with Earth at stake yet again, she had known that her feelings could not stand in the way. Besides, he had been the borderline factor- if anything had happened to Goku, he would have had to be ready to step in.  
  
Of course, he hadn't seen it that way. He had seen it as the opportunity to show up her best friend and find a formidable challenge. He had cared only for his strength, constantly pushing himself to the limit where she would only see him emerge sporadically. But that had been fine. They had only happened because once in a while she would see him and at one time, she had understood his purpose. Once she was no longer confused at the way he functioned, she could see past his outer self. He started out as curiosity, and increased into an obsession.  
  
He had been as fervent for battle as he had been for her; although to her, he had been much more brusque and calculated. Never were his defenses breached, and at times, she had believed that all that really existed between them had been the occasional good fuck. Oh, he was callous- consistently reminding her that they weren't together and they never would be. She had wondered why she put up with him. Her independence had taught her that she couldn't last with a man who constantly reminded her that she was worthless and inferior, especially when she knew she wasn't.  
  
He liked domination. He liked power. He hated remembering defeats, and above all, he detested being controlled. So they had silently agreed he would leave to train until he met his goal of becoming a Super Saiyan, and she would go her own way. After Cell, they would figure out everything else.  
  
She just hadn't counted on being pregnant.  
  
He hadn't been there, so the only option she gave herself was to do it alone. In truth, she hadn't wanted any help- the child was hers and she hadn't needed anyone's money. Her mother and father had been there for any support they could lend, so it had been needless to have anyone know she was pregnant at all- especially because of the father.  
  
Those months had been long, and at times, painful. She learned many things about herself, and in the end, she felt stronger than ever.  
  
But he had returned.  
  
Two months before she had been due, her body had been noticeable- there had been no way to hide it- and had he already known it was alright for him to stay at Capsule Corp. She hadn't bothered to hide it, and when she had found him devouring the contents of the fridge, she had let him know.  
  
Indifferent, reserved, unattached, annoyed.  
  
She remembered his first words clearly:  
  
"That is none of my concern."  
  
They had then lived in different sides of the house. 


	2. Part One: Continued: lemon

Disclaimer: I do not own or make a profit of the DBZ franchise. I do believe that the honor of creating such a show, manga, etc. is of Akira Toriyama. DBZ is a trademark of TOEI Animation (says on the label of DBZ videos) and licensed by FUNimation. So from all that legal stuff, you can conclude that I DO NOT own this stuff....I just get a kick of out using their characters for entertainment purposes. So please, do not sue.  
  
Part One -Continued *Lemon Warning  
  
* Time will stop and all is still.  
I have the skill to lead fools, but ye will have the might to follow.  
  
It was uneasy.  
  
Only two months had passed since that night. Her body and spirit were uncoordinated; her mind thought about one thing, her body reacted to another. Her stomach was nauseous, and there weren't times were she could sleep the night through. Instead, she would awake before dawn, just to have anything present in her stomach forced out. She was used to hearing the plop, plop, plop sounds as whatever she had eaten the night before swirled in the toilet. She was used to hearing herself choke as she tried to end the sickening pain, used to wearily standing up to wipe her lips, and very much accustomed to washing her mouth out with icy water.  
  
What she was not accustomed to, however, was having someone present for all of it. It was odd to have Vegeta there, and yet not exactly there either. She knew he kept watch. She felt him near her, always observing, making sure nothing dangerous happened. At times, when she was weak enough to faint, he would always be there to catch her and take her to bed.  
  
But that, she expected. To see him so gentle, so caring...those were rare the moments.  
  
She still remembered the way he had treated her after her first near fall. How he had carried her so safely, holding her curled up form to his own firmly. How at any other time, he probably would have just dumped her onto the mattress- to merely watch her body bounce against the springs- and instead, was excruciatingly careful. How he had pulled the sheets back to make enough space for her, his arms holding her body in place until he could gently lay her down, making sure she was covered up well -enough so she could be warm. And she recalled how he had slipped under the sheets to hold her, wrapping his arms around her body, making sure not to apply pressure to her stomach.  
  
It had been so...distinct. And so unlike him.  
  
But in a way, she could understand what he was feeling or at least comprehend what he was doing. He wasn't sure what to say or what was expected of him, so he did what was out of habit and protected her. He made sure he was there, despite the mood between them. Maybe it was his own penance, because of the selfishness of his past or maybe it was because some part of him had always wanted to treat her that way and had only recently found a valid reason. But no matter what, he made sure that no harm would come to her.  
  
It was fine. She just had to get used to it. Because after all, she was used to doing this alone.  
  
______  
  
He growled.  
  
'Why am I here? This woman, she is weak and needy. I am a warrior, not a nurse.'  
  
He didn't want to care nor did he want to be so detailed. But she was weak, and as long as she was in this state, he had to care. She was so fragile, now more than ever, and if anything happened to her, it would be his fault. He was concerned for her health, and because he had no experience whatsoever in these types of situation, it made him all the more weary. He wasn't sure what to expect. He wasn't sure if her morning sickness was normal and he wasn't sure to what extent this sudden weakness would go.  
  
He knew some things. His 'teachings' during his youth did cover females, but only in the mating sense. He knew about 'etiquette' and tradition, when to do what and where, but even that was mostly instinct. Child bearing was also 'taught', so he knew what to expect from a Saiyan woman, but it was mostly the woman's doing. The woman knew what to do and the men were rarely present, unless there were complications. Besides, from what he had heard, the bond between mates was strong enough that they could both share their ki to support the child's. And what he was 'taught' was just a vague description anyway, seeing as his 'instructors' were some of the last Saiyans that existed and weren't the most reliable sources.  
  
He regretted not being there the first time. He could have at least then learned what happened during human pregnancy. And as he looked over to the bathroom door and heard his mate choking as usual, guilt washed over him.  
  
'Did she have to suffer this much? Are all humans this way or is it because she is a special case? Even so, I doubt I am of much help....I cause her more pain than protection.'  
  
And as he thought, a notion fell upon him.  
  
His race was a burden to her.  
  
He had seen pregnant humans before. They were large and emotional, but besides that, they had seemed to not experience pain. It was he who brought her this pain. It was his superior race, the race of strength....the race of power.  
  
He vaguely knew that even Saiyan women suffered through pregnancy, and ignorance was not an excuse to put his own woman through this again! She was a weak human- physically at least- and to have her suffer because of what he did was pernicious. His mental debate was then interrupted when Bulma stepped out of the bathroom. He looked up and noticed her weakened form. Her knees trembled as she stood, her lips discolored, eyes tired, and everything about her seemed to scream misery.  
  
She closed her eyes for a moment and somehow lost her balance. She tipped over, without enough strength to even cry out. He caught her quickly, before her knees had time to bend at that awkward angle, like a calf learning to walk for the first time. She groaned, blinking heavily once, and sagged into him as he carried her back to bed.  
  
He growled at himself. His mind seemed to taunt him, a little demon emerging from the fragments of darkness that remained, and he felt as frustrated as when he had discovered he wasn't the Legendary Super Saiyan.  
  
'This is what you do to those you care for? Vegeta, you are one fucking sorry bastard.'  
  
He went to bed and held Bulma gently in his arms as he buried his face in her shoulder and waited for his mind to continue the torture.  
  
___________  
  
They were almost over, those first three months. The morning sickness had mostly disappeared, and except for the usual fatigue, she was content. Trunks was as helpful as possible and seemed even more protective than his father. Vegeta, however, had become distant, not as watchful as before, and it seemed as though it hurt him to be near her. She wasn't sure what to think of it and ended up deciding that Vegeta's character wasn't likely to change because of this baby.  
  
He never publicly showed emotions, so his distance wasn't really a surprise. But she caught him frequently with a pained expression on his face, his eyes in a faraway place, as his demeanor changed. He almost looked...regretful. That worried her, and because she knew she didn't dare ask, she was left without insight to his mind.  
  
______  
  
Chi-chi sat in her chair, quietly sipping her tea. Bulma had come to drop off Trunks, and soon after, both boys had run off. The house was left to the women. Since Goku was training, they both knew the house would be empty for a while.  
  
They were good friends, especially since their sons were very close and rarely spent time apart. The wives were used to seeing each other often, and even more-so when their sons made trouble. They had much in common, and because Chi-chi was the only one who had made it through two Saiyan pregnancies, she was a valuable asset to Bulma.  
  
They had a routine, where the boys would escape leaving them to their own devices. They would have small talk, drink tea, and then- if time permitted- they would have personal conversations, discussing matters that were of real importance to them. Sometimes it would be work-related, other times, their husbands might slip through the cracks of privacy and an entirely new subject would be brought up.  
  
"How are you feeling?" It was the same opener every time, a courteous signal that they had plenty of time to talk.  
  
"I'm becoming less tired, which is my sign that the real pregnancy is about to begin."  
  
"Ah." Chi-chi nodded.  
  
"Don't you think it's a little weird that it took longer this time for my sickness to pass?"  
  
The woman gave a confused expression. "What do you mean?"  
  
"I don't know, I guess I feel more drained than I thought I would. I know Trunks was a long time ago, but I don't remember being that tired with him. But this one....only now have I begun to feel better."  
  
The raven haired woman paused to think. "I'm not sure. Maybe everything might seem more...dramatic? I can't really explain. It seems to me that Goten's pregnancy was more difficult than Gohan's. Maybe it has to do with their..." She blushed, and coughed lightly. "Conception. Goku seems to think that the stronger he was, the stronger our sons would be. It may be a Saiyan thing. Are you worried?"  
  
Bulma looked down, her hand resting lightly on her stomach. "A little, I just don't want anything to go wrong."  
  
"Well if you're worried, why don't you ask Vegeta?" the woman briskly suggested. "If anyone should know about Saiyan babies, it should be him." She stood up, carrying her cup to the kitchen. Her voice floated into the room, the sound of running water accompanying it. "Besides," she added, "Vegeta is so proud of his race, there shouldn't be much problem getting answers from him." She walked back in, wiping her hands on a cloth. "I wish I could help you more. But I can only tell you what happened, not why. And...." She hesitated. "You know I'm not entirely...human. Other than Videl, you're the only other one to go through it, and Gohan's only half -Saiyan....Sorry, Bulma, but you're one of a kind."  
  
The blue haired beauty sighed. "Well, getting answers from Vegeta will be no picnic."  
  
Chi-chi frowned. "Maybe. You never know what to expect from that man, but you can always hope for the best." She smiled. "So, do you want something to eat?"  
  
_____  
  
He had spent the entire day thinking about it. What could he do to make this easier on her? It had been a waste of a day, spending time thinking about Bulma instead of training.  
  
He sat at the floor of the GR, his legs crossed as he tried to meditate.  
  
"Our existence is one."  
  
He frowned, his scowl growing deeper.  
  
"And whatever happened before we were together.... That is in the past."  
  
He stood up, growling furiously as he punched one of the walls.  
  
No! I am not ready for this, I never have been! It's a weakness, she will not accept it! I've done too much wrong, and she may understand some, but she does not know all. I cannot put her through the pain of knowing what I was. I cannot allow it!  
  
He breathed heavily, his rage disappearing as quickly as it had come and compelling him to sit back down.  
  
Am I ready for this? I have tried to prove myself worthy; I've striven to show her my merit. I have given my life for her and I'd give more. It has been no sacrifice to be with her, she accepted me readily before I accepted her. She allowed me into her body and her heart, do I not owe her? Does she not deserve to grasp what she desires? She asks that I allow her inside, she asks that we become one. I'm a fool to have not given her such a thing earlier, but perhaps it is better now...... perhaps I shall give her all.  
  
He left the room and went in search of his mate.  
  
______  
  
He found her soundly asleep in their bedroom. The room was dark, with a single window open, light passing through to her form. It was late, so he quietly stepped into the room, closing the door behind him as he made his way to the bed. He watched her sleep. He felt calmed by her presence, his body slowly filling with need as he observed her light breathing, as her chest rose and dropped, her lips parted with each breath.  
  
By god...  
  
He undressed, slipping under the covers and placing his body next to hers, making sure not to touch her. In a moment, his fingers began tracing lightly over her arms, caressing the curves that led into the dip of her neck. He kissed softly around her shoulders, sliding the strap of her nightgown down, exposing the skin to his anxious lips, and kissed until he reached her lower back, before making his way back up again. She sighed, turning over to face him, the loose fabric exposing one of her breasts. As he bent down, tasting the bountiful flesh, his fingers carefully removed the rest her silk covering. He had turned back to her rosy chest when he felt a hand brushing through his hair.  
  
"Vegeta," she breathed, her eyes still closed. "It's really you."  
  
He looked up curiously, an amused look playing across his face. "Who would it be?"  
  
Her chest dropped as she exhaled. "I thought I was still dreaming." She looked at him through heavily lidded eyes and smiled. "I was having an....interesting dream." She blushed, the heat rising to her cheeks. "It was kinda erotic."  
  
"Oh?" His eyebrows rose.  
  
She looked down, finding the top half of her body bare. "What are we doing here?"  
  
He gave a wry smile. "Waking you." He leaned in to kiss her breast again, but her hand stopped him. Her fingers tilted his chin up, her eyes shinning brightly.  
  
"Up here." She pointed to her lips and pulled him in.  
  
She kissed him slowly, her lips brushing lightly over his until her tongue dropped in to explore. She wrapped her arms around him, her hands readily roaming his body, encouraging him to do the same. His fingers traced over her figure, resting a hand on her hip as the other removed any remaining clothing. He touched her damp core, dipping two fingers and testing her reaction. She moaned against his mouth and his fingers moved in again. His thick organ already throbbed with arousal and he quickly removed his hand to replace it with himself. He began slowly and deeply, his lips never loosing contact with hers. As he felt her body respond to his movements, he could sense their child as well.  
  
"Bulma," he rasped. "We shall be joined by your rites."  
  
He trembled when he felt her moist breath around his throat, her nibbling and nipping making it difficult to concentrate.  
  
She then blinked, unable to form any coherent thoughts at the moment. "What?" He pushed deeper into her body and she cried out. "Mm-marriage?"  
  
He kissed her roughly, tongues massaging tediously, bodies moving erratically. In between kisses, he growled. "Yes." His hands slid down her hips, to grip her rear. "I know you've wanted to..." He hissed as he felt her tongue dipping into his chest, beads of sweat rolling down his throat. "Or," he took a gulp of air, "is that an assumption?"  
  
Their slick bodies moved fluidly, friction creating sounds of pleasure.  
  
She bucked against him, her nails digging into his back. "Wh...wh-why nowwww-Kami!" she cried out hoarsely.  
  
He grunted, his control quickly slipping away. "Does it matter?" he questioned, his breathing ragged.  
  
The bed frame groaned at their rhythm, the room echoing with arduous breathing. She sucked at his chest and shoulders, her hands rubbing over his hard stomach.  
  
"I'm-" He stiffened when he felt her warm hands touch where they joined and in answer, he gripped the sheets as rapture shot through his groin. "I'm giving you....what you want..." He released a guttural groan. "Take. It. Just....decide wh-when."  
  
She clung desperately to his body, a thick scent filling her lungs. She searched for his lips, moaning his name repeatedly. Their hips pushed at each other, frantically seeking release. Their eyes locked intently, reflecting each other's need.  
  
He spilled his seed into her, as she came into him, their bodies shuddering in delight, skin glowing with exhaustion. He continued to move slowly, prolonging the numb feeling in his mind, but when it eventually passed, Vegeta collapsed next to his mate, fighting to quickly regain stability. Bulma, however, promptly fell asleep, and the light, even breathing he had heard before soon reached his ears. He rested for a moment before walking over to the open window, and spent the rest of the night contemplating on his own and observing the stars. 


	3. Part One: Concluded

Disclaimer: I do not own or make a profit of the DBZ franchise. I do believe that the honor of creating such a show, manga, etc. is of Akira Toriyama. DBZ is a trademark of TOEI Animation (says on the label of DBZ videos) and licensed by FUNimation. So from all that legal stuff, you can conclude that I DO NOT own this stuff....I just get a kick of out using their characters for entertainment purposes. So please, do not sue.  
  
Part One -Continued  
  
* Behold I am coming quickly, my sword is the judge.  
For the weight that presses on your heart, I shall lift by my hand.  
Forgive ye weakness and know thy strength.  
  
An array of colors arranged intricately on a canvas, each shade conveying a meaning, of peace and wonder. The tones danced freely in the sky, gliding idly to the music of Mother Earth. Their leader was the bringer of life, the counterpart of the moon. The sun performed its musical composition as it took a bow, slowly leaving the stage, and the bright colors of the world following suit.  
  
He laid back with his body sprawled on the roof before sitting up abruptly, ebony eyes fixated on the scene before him. He growled, returning to his previous position and shaking his foot impatiently.  
  
'Stupid sun. It doesn't have to be so slow.'  
  
He looked up, relieved to find that the heavens had darkened, thousands of tiny lights beginning to appear. He sighed, wearily surveilling, waiting to find what he had been looking for.  
  
'It's here. I can feel it.'  
  
Soon, more and more stars appeared, until it seemed they would rain down on the world. Then, they finally emerged, and he knew it was time.  
  
He looked down across to the empty yard. He hoped the woman would realize their meaning.  
  
______  
  
Soft grunts whispered into her ears.  
  
Symphonies of desire, frenzied strokes, fingers kneading, flesh rubbing.  
  
Another grunt, another moan.  
  
Glimmer of crimson, cherished taste of knowledge.  
  
Bliss of union.  
  
______  
  
It was the same dream, again and again.  
  
That wasn't technically true. They were different dreams, but they felt like belonged together. Three diamonds floating in a calm sea, a towering brown tribe that protectively covered her.....and making love in shadows of scarlet. She didn't know why, but she felt that the dreams were somehow connected -a part of something large and very important.  
  
And she hadn't told anyone, not about the dreams or Vegeta's proposal. She felt that both things were private and for the latter, secrecy was essential.  
  
"Mom! Mom!" A young Trunks burst into the room excitedly. "Mom, it was so coo-" He stopped immediately when he noticed his mother was still in bed. He cocked his head to the side. "Did I wake you up?"  
  
Bulma shook her head, and smiled. "No, I was just thinking. Where's Chi- chi?"  
  
"TRUNKS!" The angry woman stomped into the bedroom, glaring. "How dare you wake up your mother! You know she was tired!"  
  
"So-sorry, Chi-chi." Trunks laughed nervously and gave his mother a sheepish grin. "I didn't know she was still asleep." He looked toward the window, sighing in relief for the distraction from the fiery woman's wrath. "Look, there's Goten now!" He rushed over and pulling the windowpane down, stuck his head out to yell. "HEY GOTEN!!! LET'S COOK THAT FISH UP!!!"  
  
It was then a soaked Goten came into view, a fish trailing behind. "Yeah, yeah, I'm coming..." The younger friend frowned. "Why did I have to do all the work?"  
  
Trunks chuckled, watching as his best friend walked up to the glass. He grinned, resting his arms on the sill. "Because," he shrugged. "I'll give you one of my toys."  
  
An eyebrow rose. "That doesn't work anymore, Trunks. I'm not seven."  
  
He grinned again in response. "Yeah, and it didn't work at nine or eleven either, did it?"  
  
The demi saiyan sulked. "Shut up."  
  
"Aw, come on, Chibi. Don't get mad it me. So you got a little wet, are you going to die?"  
  
Goten shot him an angry look. "No!"  
  
"So then what's the problem?"  
  
"Fine!" He tossed the large fish into the air. "You cook it!"  
  
"Goten!!" The teenager leaped out the window and scrambled to the spot his best friend stood. The carp landed on him with a thud. "You big jerk!" He rose slowly, wiping the grime off his pants.  
  
The response echoed back at him. "YOU'RE THE JERK, TRUNKS!"  
  
Bulma watched as Trunks wiped the rest of the dirt off and picked up the carp, grumbling to himself as he left. Both women chuckled at the scene, as Chi-chi made her way to the bed. They had spent most of the day planning at the Son house, making arrangements for the big day.  
  
"Ready to finish up? We just have a couple more things to decide...and one of them is...." The raven haired woman pulled out a magazine. "Dresses!"  
  
Bulma smiled, watching amusedly as her friend showed her the choice designs. Outside, she could see smoke arising from a small fire, and the silhouette of two laughing boys.  
  
"You know what? It seems like such a nice night, maybe we should go outside and roast marshmallows with the boys." Bulma sighed happily. "It would be like being kids again, and it looks so relaxing..."  
  
Chi-chi sighed at the sight and set the magazine down. "Alright...let's go make smores."  
  
The mothers trudged up the hill, carrying bags of snacks in their arms. The foursome ate, and the smell attracted a nearby Saiyan. Goku joined them, and after eating, the group lay on the grass and observed the night sky.  
  
"Look at all the stars." Goten squinted, and used his finger to point out different shapes. "Trunks, let's play connect the dots."  
  
His friend snorted, but agreed. "Whatever."  
  
Goku stared at the sky. "There are so many stars tonight....I wonder why."  
  
"Guess it just depends on the night," his wife answered back lightly.  
  
"Yeah..." He looked toward the west and pointed. "See those three? They seem to shine the brightest."  
  
"They do!" The raven haired woman sat up. "Look Bulma, aren't they beautiful?!"  
  
The scientist nodded. "They're so bright. Maybe it's part of a constellation," Bulma said, turning her focus to the two boys who were already asleep in the grass.  
  
"Goku, could you carry the boys inside? I'll clean up after them." Chi-chi stood and began to pick up the wrappers scattered by the fireside, while her husband carried the teenagers inside. She finished cleaning and glanced back to her friend, surprised to find her still observing the sky. "Bulma, are you coming inside?"  
  
Bulma answered softly, her eyes fixated on the oddly aligned stars. "Actually, I think I'm going to head back home...and if it's alright with you, can Trunks stay here?"  
  
"Sure, but why do you need to leave so early? It's only seven."  
  
She nodded. "I know. But I need to speak to Vegeta."  
  
"Oh." Chi-chi began to walk home. "Alright." Although the woman wasn't sure what was occurring, she figured the heavens had something to do with it.  
  
______  
  
He felt disappointed. Not only was the night half over, but Bulma hadn't even bothered to come home. She must of felt it -it was so strong. But it was a sign...it meant the bond wasn't intended to happen. He had worked so hard to become worthy, striving to reject the evil that tried to worm into his soul on a daily basis. She was the one that prevented him from giving in, and it was she who had invisibly led him where he knew he needed to go -even though he wasn't there yet. He couldn't yet say he was a moral person....he barely knew the difference. But he knew that if there was anytime to join permanently with his woman, it was now. If he had done so when he had first taken her as a mate, it would have been too soon, too much contrast. Adjusting from the life of an enslaved warrior to a free, solitary man was difficult, and even moreso when he had someone to accompany him.  
  
Yes, he needed someone to be there, he needed to learn what friendship was, but he could not yet give up his new life. He could not give up his freedom, to do whatever he please, whether it was good or bad, nor could he join with the woman in the early stages of their relationship if he had not known who he was. So he lived with her, developed a life with her, but he had also had his own destiny. He had learned her ways, but he could not be like Bulma, he could never live as if he did not know the extent of what evil could do. He knew what it did, and at one time, he relished in that life. But he also needed to know if he could give it up entirely -if he could continue without looking back, without returning to such temptation. Buu was the ultimate test, and he needed to become strong enough so that no matter what side he chose, he'd be able to survive.  
  
In the end, he had learned he could live for others.  
  
But maybe now was the time for his ultimate punishment, maybe this was the time to pay for past deeds. And what better way than to have him remain alone forever. She understood him, but not completely, not the way it was meant to be. She hadn't yet lived his life as he was to live hers. And although she was as close as anyone would ever be; to him, they weren't tied, they weren't one. It was what he wanted the most, what his heart would never allow him to ache for until now. Being with her was not enough anymore, and he needed to become her, become a part of her soul.  
  
The only thing his custom required of him was to have his mate decide the right time. He had pushed his pride aside enough to let her know that he was willing, and had forgotten his pride enough to let her know that he wanted to, that he was ready. If she would choose the only time royalty was allowed to form bonds, then they would be destined to be each other's for eternity. And after a lifetime of waiting -for they only appeared at half a Saiyan's lifetime- the three stars of Vegetasei had finally arrived and he had received his omen. And the only thing he was missing was his mate. One who had chosen not to come.  
  
He had not moved from the roof, instead, he had kept a watchful eye on the heavens and on the house. He sat up and quickly looked around. He sensed she was here, but she was not alone. He couldn't tell who it was, but she was not alone at all! He levitated into the air, detecting the exact location of Bulma. He flew slowly, carefully scanning the woods beyond the compound. He came upon a clearing, and he quietly set foot on the ground, making sure to stay a few feet back.  
  
Behind a tree, he observed his mate talking to a man dressed in robes, but what caught his attention was Bulma's attire. She was in a simple long dress, and although he didn't know much about fashion, he knew this was somewhat less than what she would usually wear. The dress didn't look costly or extravagant, yet it looked as if it were made for Bulma, and only Bulma. It didn't matter. The cost, the color, the design. What made him realize he had been holding his breath was the fact that the dress and the small crown of flowers on her head made her look...natural and more beautiful than he could ever imagine. She had known, and she had felt it.  
  
_____  
  
It was a short and private union. The celestial bodies were their witnesses, any vows said were uttered by heart, and their first, long awaited joining was complete. The second rite took place after their legal coupling, with Vegeta explaining to Bulma the importance of the joining of their souls. She readily accepted and after making love in the mists of nature, and relishing in each other's essence, their link was finalized. It was no longer Bulma or Vegeta; it was a combination of Bulma and Vegeta, Vegeta and Bulma. No longer were they alone...or unknown. 


	4. Part Two: Mind: lemon

Disclaimer: I do not own or make a profit of the DBZ franchise. I do believe that the honor of creating such a show, manga, etc. is of Akira Toriyama. DBZ is a trademark of TOEI Animation (says on the label of DBZ videos) and licensed by FUNimation. So from all that legal stuff, you can conclude that I DO NOT own this stuff....I just get a kick of out using their characters for entertainment purposes. So please, do not sue.  
  
This now begins part two and is entirely from Bulma's point of view. *Lemon Warning*  
  
* The strength within is brought among shadows, weakness is discovered  
among light. Those closest are the ones to fail.  
  
Part Two: Mind  
  
I never knew how alone I really was until I became linked with him. We were together, we had a child and we're having another. To me, it seemed like a normal relationship -it was as close as we could get. But to him... there was just... there was always the possibility for more, to have something deeper than ever imagined, and to make this marriage look as deep as a puddle.  
  
We became fusion in every sense of the mind and soul.  
  
At least, that's what it first felt like. It was confusing -there were no boundaries. I could easily pass into his mind without notice. And I couldn't understand what would cause certain feelings -how I could suddenly slip from joy to rage -nor could I tell the difference between his emotions and mine. And the worst was knowing that some of my emotions were hormone induced, leaving me to think that some of these feelings weren't real at all.  
  
But as time passed on, I learned it is like fusion, although not entirely the same concept. We are one, we are united, but I no longer have to worry that I can't be myself. That I would somehow pass the walls of my own mind to lump into Vegeta's. I've learned to control it -even if it was through his guidance. I'm still Bulma Briefs, it's just that it's not only Bulma anymore. Now, part of what makes me who I am is the fact that I'm with Vegeta. Without him, I'm not entirely myself, nor could I ever be. And ever since we've linked, I'm never alone.  
  
There's always a strong presence, like he's right beside me -so close, his breath lands on my skin. It's comforting. And it feels like this is what we were supposed to do all along. I know it took Vegeta a lot to go through with it, and I thank Kami that he had the courage to do it.  
  
______  
  
I turn awkwardly, frowning at the sight before me. Looking back, I take a quick glance at the clock. Ruby digits beam that it's close to dawn, and I sigh. I still don't understand why he would wake up so early to train. He knows what day this is, and if he thought he could lock himself away in that metal dome, then he's dead wrong.  
  
I push myself up into a sitting position, my back leaning heavily against the wooden headrest, my body sinking into the mattress. With my arms crossed over my chest, I survey the room, staring at the mess he made as he snuck away.  
  
Jerk.  
  
My stomach growls in agreement and I look down to my swollen belly. If my constant cravings couldn't prove I was pregnant, this certainly did! 'Three more months and this babe is outta here.' I shrug, and without hesitation, I waddle over to the fridge, my feet dragging against the shaggy carpet as I pull out my nightly snack. A while back, I decided that getting a mini-fridge in the room was a better idea than having to lug my huge body up and down stairs while fumbling in the dark. So with a bowl and jar tucked under my arms, I settle down contently on the mattress, scooping out my ice creme and sprinkling large chunks of pickles as toppings. I shove the spoon into my mouth, savoring the sweet and sour flavors as they melt slowly against my tongue. I grin, and look toward the door, beginning to count down.  
  
"4...3...2...1..."  
  
The door slams shut with my angry and sweaty husband stomping toward the bed. He towers over me, growling.  
  
I smile. "Couldn't get the GR on, huh?"  
  
He shakes his head tensely, clenching and unclenching his jaw. "No." he hisses sharply. "I couldn't." He looks to my food and then quickly looks away in disgust. "Care to explain why?"  
  
I look down at my bowl. I guess not that many people like the idea of dill pickles swimming in melted ice creme. I've noticed he doesn't like most of the food I eat. I've also noticed that I don't care. Besides, the angrier I can get him, the better -it's about time he gives me what I want.  
  
"Vegeta," I answer sweetly, licking the back of my spoon. "Don't tell me you forgot what I told you? Remember how I kept telling you that our party was today? I guess you forgot...even though I reminded you about a million times!" I huff, placing the dish aside. "I kept telling you, over and over and, you kept ignoring me! Vegeta, next week is our party, Vegeta, our party is in three days -all I ever did was remind you!"  
  
The memories of last year's celebrations are still vivid in my mind. To say the least, it was a disaster, but I guess it wasn't entirely Vegeta's fault. Trunks played a role in it, too. But I hope that this year, the boys have grown up. Although....I doubt it. Which is why I have to warn Vegeta now!  
  
I push myself off the bed, my hand on my hip as I poke the Prince with my finger. "Now you listen here! You will NOT use the GR during the course of this day -you WILL behave, you will not cause trouble, AND," I eye him wearily, "you will not go looking for a fight! Do you understand me Vegeta? I don't want to see any blood, or missing teeth, or broken bones. I want a nice party. A NICE PARTY!" I turn my back to him, hastily grabbing my bowl, muttering on my way to the fridge. "Stupid saiyans......big dumb jerk....I swear....for once, a good party.....incident free!...."  
  
I know I'm moody, and I hate the fact that I react so readily to anything that happens. But...I can't help it, so I'll just have to wait for this anger to pass. I put the bowl away, and take a quick drink of water.  
  
"Piss me off?"  
  
I stop, looking behind me as I place the water down. "What?"  
  
"You are trying to provoke me." He crosses his arms, ebony eyes fixed toward me. "Why?"  
  
I shake my head in annoyance, making my way back to bed. "Wise-ass! You're not supposed to go around reading my mind!"  
  
He grunts, rolling his eyes and taking a step toward me. "I didn't need to read your mind woman. It's clear what you're trying to accomplish. What I want to know is how angering me," He advances, slowly plucking off his glove. "benefits you."  
  
I growl, a small snort accompanying afterward. "Vegeta, not everything is about you. I just want you to stay out of the GR. Simple as that."  
  
He stands silently for a moment, and his eyes suddenly portray interest. I shudder -I know that feeling too well now. Looking closely, I watch as his body begins to react to my thoughts. He opens his mouth to speak, but inhales sharply, cocking his head to the side. "You're in heat." he comments quietly.  
  
He doesn't wait for my answer. Instead, he gives me a knowing smile and begins to peel the spandex off his body. He leans down, his nose bumping into mine. His eyes shine in excitement. "Looks like it's going to be one of those days..."  
  
I agree and pull him down.  
  
______  
  
Getting away from that Saiyan is one of the hardest things to do. Not only does he recognize that I'm horny, he takes full advantage of it. Any time he sees me, one touch and I'm his. And I can't avoid it! Lately, I can't seem to control a damn thing. It's like my hormones dominate every aspect of my life now.  
  
I told him during our last round that he better leave so I could at least try to get dressed, and for once he complied, escaping quickly and leaving me to recover.  
  
It's half an hour later and I stand before my dress, freshly showered. I actually like this sundress, even if it is something that I wouldn't usually wear. I quickly put it on, checking myself in the mirror to make sure I'm not wearing any mismatched shoes. There have been one too many times where I walk out looking like a clown because my stomach prevents me from seeing my feet. Well not this time! I turn slowly, craning my neck so I can see what the dress looks like in the back. I beam in delight, my hands resting proudly on my hips. I don't look fat....do I?  
  
______  
  
"Hey-hey! Bulma!"  
  
I turn around when I hear the excited cry, and Krillen stops short of my stomach. His wife and daughter stand behind him, Trunks watching eagerly the entrance to the building.  
  
"Whoa!" His eyes widen with intrigue and he attempts to give me a hug.  
  
His arms barely touch my hips. He laughs at this fact. Loudly. "Man! You're huge! When did that happen?"  
  
I growl at him, making a point to look down menacingly. "I'm what?"  
  
He looks to his wife and stammers, shoving his hands into his pockets nervously. He stares down. "Umm, the place looks great."  
  
I eye him suspiciously. "Wait. What did you call me?"  
  
"Come on, Krillen." Eighteen cuts in, grabbing the short man and pulling him away. I see the relief flash through his eyes and I snort in repugnance.  
  
"MOM!!" My son suddenly shouts at me from across the room. "CALM DOWN!!"  
  
What! I stomp my foot down and glare. Does Trunks want a piece of me, too?  
  
"BULMA!"  
  
I turn back around - again-, only to be squished into someone's embrace. My words are muffled as I try to push the person away. They finally realize what I'm trying to do and they let go. "Listen you! What's the big ide-"  
  
"Oh, sorry Bulma." I hear a prompt apology, with a blushing Yamucha looking down at his shoes. "I hadn't noticed that you were-"  
  
"Pregnant?" Only he- and Goku- would hug me without thought. "It's ok, but next time, try to be a little gentler."  
  
He gives an embarrassed smile, placing his hand in the back of his neck. He rubs slowly, as if concentrating on the right words. He finally looks me in the eye. "So...when did it happen?"  
  
He seems as shy as always when it comes to my love life, tending to innocently stick behind. I hope that one day he'll get over it and find someone. But until that happens, I might as well give him some small details about this and help him have fun.  
  
"I'm six months along." I glance over to where a group has formed, and step aside. "You should go in and say hi to the others."  
  
He nods. "Yeah....Hey, sorry I didn't let go."  
  
"It's ok, Yamucha. You didn't know." I stand behind him and begin to push, forcing him into the garden. "Go! Have some fun will ya?" It's great to see him, even if it's only a few times a year.  
  
He laughs as he trips into the garden. "Alright already! You don't have to push!"  
  
______  
  
The men stay away. I think that's understandable, after all, they all seemed either embarrassed or surprised. Maybe a little afraid. Of both of us, I imagine. The guys are probably worried that if they say one thing wrong about this baby, Vegeta will make sure their faces are buried in dirt, or if they do anything to tick me off, I'll make them wet their pants.  
  
Whatever.  
  
The women are, of course, different stories. They're all excited. And this party is mostly a women's party, because even though we are having a reunion and celebrating the Buu anniversary, we've also turned this thing into a baby shower. All rolled in one.  
  
So I sit, watching as Chi-chi does all the cooking. Nobody wants me to do anything! I can't be near the grill because the smoke will do me harm, I can't go serve the food because the plates are too heavy, I can't even say the food is done because I just might be trampled. It's irritating.  
  
"So how are you doing?" Videl stands next to my chair, baby Pan sleeping on her shoulder.  
  
I huff. "I'm can't believe I'm bored at my own party."  
  
She laughs and pulls out a seat. "I'm sorry." She sits down. "Do you know what it is yet?"  
  
I place my hand on my stomach. "No."  
  
The bundle on her shoulder stirs and the air is abruptly pierced with wailing. She takes the baby and starts to cradle her, in a moment, Pan is suckling on her breast. "Can Vegeta tell you?"  
  
I rest my chin in my hands. "No."  
  
"Really? I thought they could do that kinda thing...Gohan can always sense when someone is coming..."  
  
I sigh. "I think it's different...besides, he won't really tell...something about the baby being strong but it has a different type of ki...or something like that..." I look over to find that Pan's asleep again. "Are you having a hard time taking care of her?"  
  
Videl shakes her head. "Actually, it's not that bad. Goku told us that it's better for her to keep her...you know," she leans in close to whisper. "tail, so that we can keep her calmer that way. It's amazing." She holds Pan up, and through the blanket, I can see her tail is wrapped protectively around her waist. "Gohan says we should keep it only for a few more months and then they'll uh...cut it off."  
  
"Videl! Can you take this to the boys?" Chi-chi interrupts shrilly, holding a plate of meat up.  
  
"Will you watch Pan for a little bit?" She passes me the baby and rushes off.  
  
I look down to the sleeping sweetheart and then over to Vegeta.  
  
I want a girl.  
  
______  
  
I shut the door behind me, my fingers searching blindly for a switch, when an arm slithers under my stomach and reels me in. Jumping slightly when a warm tongue flicks over my earlobe, a low chuckle rumbles, vibrating down my back. He leads me backwards, and with each careful step, I am slowly left naked in his arms. He presses into me, exhaling lightly on my throat.  
  
"Couldn't last thirty minutes." he notes haughtily, fingers running down my sides.  
  
"I know." I respond softly, the heat rising to my cheeks as I remember the recent rendezvous in the pantry. "Vegeta." There's a tone of eagerness in my voice that informs me that I am desperate.  
  
"Shh." he cuts me off, and continues to pull me back, he is the only guide in the darkness of the room. "Tsk-tsk." He wags a finger before my eyes, and trails it down my chest, short kisses following over my shoulder. "Must not be so impatient." He stops, allowing me to turn around and quickly notice that he's already stripped. "Lean forward." he commands, and I obey, my elbows bending and my forearms flat on the panel he has led me to. "Now..." he exhales heavily, stepping up behind me. "Don't touch anything....wouldn't want to accidentally give this thing power, would we?"  
  
I nod quickly, my body trembling in excitement. Oh god, I want it. Badly.  
  
His arousal presses into my back, his fingers sliding over my entrance. I swallow audibly as his lips land on my neck, more soft kisses descending over my spine. My body arches toward his, his thick organ crushed into my rounded flesh. He places his hands on my hips and guides his body into mine. Steady rhythm, forces me to ache for more. My knees bend, my hips pushing towards his, bucking for quicker strokes.  
  
"Bulma..." he taunts me, leaning over, and his tongue tracing over the curve of my cheek. "How much do you want me?"  
  
I moan, stooping into a lower position, spreading my legs wider.  
  
He laughs quietly. "Good answer."  
  
My eyes slide shut, submersing myself in these erotic sensations. Wet tongue lapping over my skin, controlled breaths covering my throat, his body twitching to mine. I open my eyes, to find my vision filled by arduous reflections playing back at me. I am entranced by the room's mirrors, our movements portrayed in shadows, although I see them clearly. Our bodies arching into one another, Vegeta's wanton reaction to the touching of his stimulated sacs, the sheer look of desire on his face as my nails rake over his thighs.  
  
He says the mirrors are necessary for training -to make sure technique is perfect- I'm inclined to agree, but for my own dirty reasons. I like it because it's like watching your very own porn.  
  
My hand reaches back, I watch as Vegeta jumps when I stroke his excited balls. This is about my release, my pleasure, and part of that is getting Vegeta eager.  
  
I close my eyes once again, and push myself farther into him.  
  
The noises are becoming louder, his quiet grunts and hisses no longer exist. They are being quickly replaced by his loud breathing, the occasional groan, and his heart racing against my flesh. Our hearts thunder together in the excitement, and I am only left more aroused.  
  
'Oh Vegeta.'  
  
"WHAT!"  
  
My eyes snap open at the snarl, and look back to see Vegeta growling in annoyance, seemingly, in the direction of the door.  
  
"Vegeta? Are you in there?"  
  
I groan. I hazily recognize the happy voice of Goku, and does he have the worst timing ever.  
  
"Go....away." My husband hisses, and he leans over to kiss my cheek, drawing my lips to his. He sucks, pulling on my bottom lip.  
  
'By Dende.....'  
  
"Aw, come on buddy. You shouldn't be in the GR all by yourself."  
  
His hands grasp my hips aggressively. "I said...GO!" He pushes harder.... thick organ rubbing roughly against my inner walls. This is what I want.....  
  
Silence.  
  
"Are you alone?" Breaks in Goku's confused voice.  
  
Son of a bitch, he'll never leave!  
  
A feral growl escapes my throat, Vegeta's reaction is surprise. My nails claw at the panel. Harder!  
  
"Vegeta???"  
  
"FUCK OFF!" He roars. The slick noise of our movements rumbles throughout the room....his body slaps against mine....  
  
Hips buck, his tongue roams -don't want to lose it... Thumb rubs deliciously over my nub, he's going so hard -it's so fucking good....  
  
"Oh god! Shit...fucking, oh..." Spewing any words that can form through my lips -watch the mirrors again -mesmerized by our heated deeds as his hands grasp my hips.... synchronized joining and parting...so enthralling -narcotic....  
  
Digs deeper into my flesh....  
  
Body contracts  
  
Groaning loudly into my ear  
  
I shudder.......... he does too  
  
Our bodies throb as we release -he almost slumps over my body. He continues to move....slowly....numbly.... He stops and turns me around -pulls out- we sink to the floor. We sit there for a moment, sweaty forehead resting against mine, and our labored breathing only sound in the room.  
  
He kisses me....his lips passing over to my cheeks, then down to my chest....his head bends down to draw my breast into his mouth. His tongue rasps against my sensitive nipple, he sucks with want. My body twitches spasmodically, my release still ringing through my body -I don't want to move. Sweat still trickles down my chest, sliding under the curves. He licks the moisture, finger following to rub me.  
  
After a couple of minutes I recover enough to speak, although by that time, his cobalt eyes have been waiting for me expectantly.  
  
It's a girl. 


	5. Part Two: Concluded

I do not own or make a profit of the DBZ franchise. I do believe that the honor of creating such a show, manga, etc. is of Akira Toriyama. DBZ is a trademark of TOEI Animation (says on the label of DBZ videos) and licensed by FUNimation. So from all that legal stuff, you can conclude that I DO NOT own this stuff....I just get a kick of out using their characters for entertainment purposes. So please, do not sue.  
  
Part Two- Concluded  
  
* A time to sow, and a time to reap.  
A time to gather stones together, a time to run like hell.  
She who has ears to hear.  
How beautiful upon the mountains are the feet.  
I come to bring not peace but a sword.  
  
I knew I needed him, I just didn't expect him to actually appear. But to my surprise -and happiness- he was there. He was there for me.  
  
He took away my fear. His strong presence, as assuring as a person like him can be, it was what I needed. I will never forget that moment -before, during, after. I will never forget Trunks's birth.  
  
But now... I'm scared. The anxiety is tearing away at my gut... And I'm not sure why.  
  
_______  
  
"Bulma."  
  
Vision filled by a hazy darkness, my body is being shaken.  
  
"Bulma."  
  
He whispers again, stronger now.  
  
I jump, my eyes scan the room quickly -my heartbeat thunders in my head. I don't....understand.  
  
He sits up and faintly touches my arm. I turn, his eyes are clouded in confusion and I can see he is not used to this. He was the one who had nightmares.  
  
"Are you...alright?" he questions me quietly, conflicted in how to react.  
  
I burst into tears, only to notice that my cheeks have been wet for a while now. How is it that I've cried so much, why is it that I'm so terrified that I can't stand to be alone? As much as I want to, need to, at the moment, I'm not strong enough to console myself and I'm not nearly as calm as I wish to be. I throw myself at Vegeta, pulling him close and sobbing into his chest. My stomach gets in the way. I cry even louder.  
  
He stiffens, but in a moment, relaxes, and his arms rest at my sides.  
  
"You dreamt about her birth." he murmurs and shifts slightly, adjusting his position.  
  
I choke, my body trembles incessantly. "So beautiful....she was s-so gorgeous. She was in your arms, she was so quiet, she..." I drift off, I can't seem to find the right words. "I wasn't there." I stop and pull back, while he quickly lets go. "I wasn't there." The images are too clear, my confusion, his pain, I'm bombarded with tears again, my vision completely blurred. "It hurt so much...I couldn't hold her, I couldn't be with you." I look up, I can't read his expression -his eyes, for once, tell me nothing. "Vegeta-"  
  
"Sleep." he cuts in, wrapping his arm around me and pulling me down.  
  
"I can't!" I push him off as he looks at me in irritated anger. "I-I can't. What could it mean?"  
  
"It means nothing." he growls, and tries again, this time keeping a firm grip until my body is pressed into the mattress. "Sleep. In a month, it will be over and you will not bother me with petty worries."  
  
I close my eyes and sigh. His words offer hollow solace.  
  
______  
  
I'm ready. I am prepared for anything that comes my way. The nursery is set, so is the medical center -I have the crib and the clothes and the safety equipment. Trunks is as anxious as I am, and Vegeta looks as disinterested as usual.  
  
But I know different.  
  
He's quite nervous, even if he won't show it. This is another person to our family, and I think the fact that it's a girl gets him more nervous than he should be. Maybe he thinks that he'll have to be caring -though I doubt he'll display any affection- or maybe he's disappointed because he won't have another boy to train. In any case, I can't wait.  
  
I want her to be born already. I want to hold her in my arms and watch her sleep. I want to name her, see what she looks like -is she more like me, or Vegeta? I wish I could dress her up in little pink frilly dresses and take her out for a stroll in the park. I want to hear her first words (I know it'll be my name) and watch her first steps -I want her to exist in this world. I don't want to be pregnant anymore...I want it to be over with.  
  
But I have to be patient. No one knows when Saiyan babies are supposed to be born -the ones here on Earth have been born at different times. So I'm not sure whether I'm early or late; if I measure by Trunks's birth, I'm late, by Gohan's, I'm early. Vegeta can't say squat.  
  
My feet are now twice their size -like everything else on my body- and are swollen up like huge mangos. My back hurts, I waddle too much, and I feel like I am proof that whales can live on land. I whine, complain, scream at the drop of a pin, and last night, I cried for hours because my favorite team won the championships. I am the happiest miserable person on Earth.  
  
"Yes you are."  
  
I don't bother to look up, I know it's him. He stalks in with usual stance, our son close behind.  
  
"Mom, are you brooding?"  
  
"No." I currently sit on the couch, but in a moment I will begin struggling to get up. I lean back and lunge myself forward, using the momentum to kinda have my body roll forth, until my feet land on the floor. I grab the cushion and push up, glaring as my son steps forward to help. "Don't. I can do it on my own."  
  
He avoids my gaze, murmuring something to his father. Vegeta nods once and he looks at me. His lips tilt slightly. "Stop feeling sorry for yourself."  
  
I grunt. "I'm not."  
  
He cocks his head to the side. "Then why are you being so bitchy?"  
  
I hear Trunks inhale sharply, taking a surprised glance at his father. Vegeta only smirks, his eyes stare me down and my son hastily retreats out of the room.  
  
I answer his telepathic inquiry bluntly and aloud, seeing as our son has escaped. "Sex."  
  
His eyebrow raises in question.  
  
"The more sex we have, the faster this baby is born."  
  
His eyes widen a bit, his smirk grows proudly. "Alright." I can see he is very pleased with my proposition.  
  
He steps forward and grabs me, preparing to carry me to our room. "TRUNKS!" I call out, waiting for an answer.  
  
"WHAT!?"  
  
"I think you need to pay Goten a visit!"  
  
A blur passes, and in less than a second, he's out the door.  
  
__________  
  
Ow.  
  
I shoot up, clutching my stomach and rolling to the side. "Ow, oh, ohhh-holy mother of-!" I look up, gripping the sheets in a vain attempt to channel my pain.  
  
'Where is he!!'  
  
"Vegeta?" I try to yell and instead groan his name as I notice that in place of his body is an empty mattress. "Where the fuck are you!?" Ohhh! Another contraction hits, my nails dig into the pillow, forcing the fabric apart. In a moment the pain is gone and feathers float around me.  
  
"VEGETA!" This call is mental and unrelenting, I want to see him -NOW!  
  
Another wave strikes and I hear a loud bang in my head. Turns out, it wasn't me, but him, who had just slammed the door on his way in. Can't notice much now, it's hurting like hell and I need something to hold. "OOHHH!!!!!"  
  
"What's wrong with you!?" He stares in horror as I roll again, shredding even more sheets along the way.  
  
I wait for it to end and look up, panting. "Ba-baby." I push myself up, using him as support and reaching for the phone. I hit a button and the phone automatically dials. "Doctor? It's time." I hang up quickly and meet Vegeta's distressed expression. "Medical room."  
  
He nods, lifting me into his arms.  
  
"Don't ever do that again."  
  
He looks down. "Do what?"  
  
"Scare me. I thought you weren't here."  
  
He knows what I refer to and says nothing more as we leave the room.  
  
______  
  
"Here, put me down here." He places me on the medical bed. We are in Med. Room One -a room specifically designed for this baby's birth.  
  
He looks around in interest. He has never been in this room before, but I know he's more confused than anything. By the fifth contraction, the doctor has arrived and Vegeta seems more comfortable with what's going on, although his hesitant behavior still remains.  
  
"Ow ow ow oowwhhhh!" Another one, the most painful so far.  
  
I start swearing under my breath and I glimpse at my husband. He is pensive, but after a moment he approaches and leans down to my swelled belly. "Breathe." He says and stands back up, looking to me expectantly.  
  
"What?"  
  
He walks over, almost towering over my body. "You must breathe deeply, exhale with your...contractions. It will lessen the pain."  
  
"I know that!" I snap, lashing out and snatching his arm. Yet another hits, my nails digging into his flesh, the blood trickling down my fingers. I look down at my tainted palm, stained by what I did to him. There is a moment of uncomfortable silence before I apologize. "I'm sorry."  
  
He looks down as well, but doesn't seem to care. "It's fine."  
  
The doctor's voice breaks in. "Bulma?"  
  
We both turn to her, seated at the edge of the bed. "She's ready."  
  
I nod. I can do this.  
  
______  
  
She is beautiful. My angelic baby girl, my Bra. After ten hours of pain and frustration and of almost breaking off Vegeta's arm, she's here. She's finally here. Her bundled up form rests in my arms. She sleeps on, cuddled into my breast, as her breathing falls lightly on my chest -more proof that she is alive and mine. Or more like it, ours.  
  
And he stayed. As much as I did to drive him away, he remained by the bed, watching, making sure I didn't give up. He did yet again what took so much of his courage long ago and stayed by my side, made sure I wasn't afraid, although he knew I was as much as I tried to hide it. And when I wanted his hand, he gave it to me. When I felt so tired and weak and simply wanted to give up, he murmured words of motivation. Just like all those years ago, when I thought I was truly alone, he made his presence known. I've never felt happier or more at peace.  
  
So she lays in my arms and I look to the open window. As sleep begins to subdue my body, and Vegeta goes in search of something for us to eat, I find the open space in the night sky where the full moon is supposed to be. 


	6. Part Three: Soul by my hands

I do not own or make a profit of the DBZ franchise. I do believe that the honor of creating such a show, manga, etc. is of Akira Toriyama. DBZ is a trademark of TOEI Animation (says on the label of DBZ videos) and licensed by FUNimation. So from all that legal stuff, you can conclude that I DO NOT own this stuff....I just get a kick of out using their characters for entertainment purposes. So please, do not sue.  
  
Part Three: Soul (By My Hands)  
  
*A scarlet cord around my heart, a heavy pressure upon my soul.  
Blessed are ye whose sin is covered, no great evil I shall fear.  
Where do ye find forgiveness for failings?  
  
She cries, her small fists balled up as she turns crimson throughout her wails. In a moment, she is quiet, sucking busily at her bottle and draining the contents in seconds. She looks up, and although I am not looking at her, I can feel her looking at me. She fumbles, her small hand attempting to curl around my thumb, but I pull away as she radiates an aura of innocence that aches to be in the presence of. But, because she has no one else, I must remain, yet if I had a choice, I would not be here at all.  
  
She yawns and for once, I look down, noticing that my arm has already begun a gentle rhythmic shaking -my body reacting subconsciously to her needs. She opens her eyes in a drowsy manner, and our eyes make contact for a second before I break away for sleep to claim her. I cannot look at her for long. She has her eyes. It feels like I am looking at someone else.  
  
Why should I care? I never did before. But that was long ago, and although there are parts of the past that I do not wish to revisit, others I would return to gladly. I did not know what true pain was. Yes, I knew physical and I most surly knew of injured pride, but...I never understood the ache of a lost soul, never comprehended what it was to have your essence torn out and replaced by fragments of what was there before, only existing to cause pain and anguish. Only to remind you of what was once there, so that each day you would feel a renewed pain -a burn in your heart as the realization hit that your piece was gone. Never before have I seen myself as truly worthless, a mere pawn in a game that I will never control.  
  
I felt it once and forced it from my mind, but even then it was weak -even then it did not hurt as much as it does now. The possibility that this pain will eventually lessen has not entered my mind. It is a wound that cannot heal.  
  
Why does it hurt more than broken bones or shredded pride? I can't understand why it sears to breathe... Why my throat closes in and that damned lump appears, even as much as I attempt to control myself. The burning in my eyes has not faded, the wetness of my cheeks does not dry. It makes no difference.  
  
And then there is her.  
  
She is proof of what I have done, flesh and bone of what has disappeared into another world and that cannot return to me, despite as much as I wish it. This is my punishment. The cruel joke fate had to play. Fate waited patiently, waited for the perfect moment to inflict something that would hurt, and what better payback than to take her away from me? What better way than to spend my life alone, accompanied by the knowledge that no one will ever love me as much as she did?  
  
It is because of me that she was taken, it is because of me that she is gone.  
  
"Father?" My son steps anxiously into the room and knows to keep his distance. He is jaded, but stronger than I imagined. "Want me to take her now?"  
  
I hand the child over without thought.  
  
He pauses and looks down to the infant. "Do you want to eat?"  
  
"No."  
  
"Alright." He hesitates, I know he wants to speak, but he knows I will not listen. In a moment, he is gone, the sleeping child curled up in his arms.  
  
I am left alone again, and that is how I deserve to stay.  
  
______  
  
I was rendered breathless. I have seen her in many lights, always beautiful, always forcing me to yearn for her in desire. But it had been the first time where I felt it was an offense to look at her -to see such pure innocence was enough to grant me an eternity in hell.  
  
For some reason or another, I remembered those restless nights before the child had been born, as her mind lay on the border of anxiety and mirth. She'd sit up and read, pulling out books she had kept tucked away for such occasions that I considered it useless. All those sappy stories she read aloud only irritated me and made me want to rip the books into shreds. But she told me they were important. That she had owned the books since she could remember and had saved them, keeping them wrapped away for the time she could have a daughter and offer the child her hope. It was then that I lost all thought of destroying her books.  
  
Once, she drew out a different one from the rest, one that she treated much more carefully than the others. She smiled, as her fingers traced over the childish illustration, and then turned to me:  
  
"This one's my favorite."  
  
I asked her why. She said it was because the story had come true. She had found her prince and had restored her faith.  
  
As her resting form entered my mind, I realized why I had remembered such a thing -she was the living incarnation of the drawing on that book. She lay as a princess, skin soft and fair, rose lips pursed. She was perfection. It was then when I was overwhelmed with the need to touch her, even if it was only once. As my lips pressed faintly against hers, I realized she was no longer mine.  
  
And for the first time in what felt like a different life, I cried.  
  
______  
  
I was left powerless, my weakness displayed through uncontrollable sobs. It was not supposed to happen that way. Our bond was meant to strengthen her, to help her continue without complication. It proved pointless. I attached myself to her, only to have ripped away just as swiftly, only to know that my efforts were futile -that I could not restore her with the help of the guardian or the healing of any beans. It was too late, she was already gone, and I was left alone, with nothing more than the memory of failure burdening my soul.  
  
I cannot look at the child. I cannot love her as well. I cannot love what I have killed. 


	7. Part Three: Continued

Author's note: I don't really do these, I'd rather have people go on and enjoy the next chapter...but I have only two things to say: THANK GOD FOR DJFUSION! If it wasn't for her, I wouldn't have made it this far. And, only one more chapter to go.... Enjoy it.  
  
I do not own or make a profit of the DBZ franchise. I do believe that the honor of creating such a show, manga, etc. is of Akira Toriyama. DBZ is a trademark of TOEI Animation (says on the label of DBZ videos) and licensed by FUNimation. So from all that legal stuff, you can conclude that I DO NOT own this stuff....I just get a kick of out using their characters for entertainment purposes. So please, do not sue.  
  
* When does the judgement day come?  
Like a thief in the night.  
In an hour when ye look not for me.  
The fool says, He is not coming.  
Let us drink and be merry for he is not coming.  
Behold I stand at the door and knock...  
  
She cared.  
  
I cannot say I have ever trusted or had concern for anyone -I learned at an early age that there is no tie that is considered unbreakable. There is always a weakness, a breach where betrayal lies. Qualities of companionship were bred out of my mind quickly, a friend was only an enemy I had not yet discovered. People were useful, but only for certain tasks, and after became obsolete.  
  
I was trained to discover useful qualities, and manipulate a person until I discovered exactly what I needed from them. I would extract the necessary, and if the person was left battered and broken because of it, so be it. I just made sure it never happened to me.  
  
No one would ever really learn who I was or where my weakness dwelled -if anyone became close it was because I wished it and the situation was to my advantage. I learned that no one truly cared for anything or anyone, and any interest for well being was false and driven by malicious intent. I was suspicious of everyone.  
  
But along with all these things that have been proven to me in my life, I've also learned that the people of Earth are stupid.  
  
Some of them are exactly the type I have encountered in space, others are a type I have not met at all. To this day, I cannot understand how these morons even managed to exist for so long. They are fond of anyone, even strangers, and they welcome outsiders into their homes with an open heart, offering material and emotional support from nothing but kindness. Bulma was one of them. And I had no choice but to believe she was deranged.  
  
With a revoltingly cheerful smile and a flirtatious wink, she openly offered me her home. In a playful voice, she mentioned I was cute, and with a foolish innocence belonging only to her, she began her intrusion into my bruised soul. It was more than enough to put me on guard and make me wonder what she could possible want from me. She was not ordinary in the slightest and she proved to be more of a challenge than I could have ever imagined.  
  
She had a stubborn streak -one to match my own- only I considered it a waste of ability as she did things for unselfish reasons. I wanted to control her, to feel that power once again that had been unrightfully stripped from me, and see her cower in fear because of it. The worst thing she ever did -and in some way, the best- had been to resist me. She had an independent mind and mouth that couldn't stay shut. She didn't see me as an uncontrollable monster that could destroy her without thought, she considered me one of her playthings. A puzzle to figure out. It infuriated me to no end. Yet somehow...she became my first friend.  
  
And I loathed her for it.  
  
_______  
  
The surroundings are the same, I see no difference from what was here before. I have been living in turmoil, yet this place remains in peace. It would drive me to a jealous rage were I not so tired. My mind and heart deteriorates, my body offers no strength. And although my pride implores me to reconsider, I must seek relief. Even if it is from a weak Namek.  
  
The guardian, however, has changed and he's no longer untainted as he used to be. His body is burdened by wisdom, traces of innocence mar his eyes. He is weak, but the power held in his hands could leave a man crippled in bliss. He is encumbered -bound by the responsibility of watching over this earth. He used to be intimidated by me. Now he looks at me with sadness.  
  
He apologizes quietly. "I'm sorry I was not there."  
  
Only two chairs rest in the bare room, and although I am sure he has done nothing all day, he sits as if he were exhausted, holding a wooden staff between his thin hands.  
  
"Bring her back."  
  
He shakes his head and for a moment, looks away. "I can't. Not yet."  
  
I growl. I will not take anything less. "Why?"  
  
He closes his eyes, and I am left with the Namek in silence. His breathing turns heavy and echoes off the marble. His fingers trace the wood blindly.  
  
"I can take away your pain, but it is not my duty to do it," he tells me as he opens his eyes. He sighs. "It is hers."  
  
My fists clench in anger. I have no patience for this. "Namek, stop playing these games!" He jumps slightly, the staff falling from his hands and toward the floor.  
  
He looks at me, dispirited. "What if it was meant to be?"  
  
I've heard enough! He may apologize for her death, but he may not excuse it with the will of fate! If he were not a being of purity, my anger would take what little control I have left and allow me to kill him. But I need this. I need her. And he is the one who will return her to me. I must remain in control.  
  
"No," I hiss. "It is not meant to be this way. I did this to her. It was my fault, and if it wasn't for me, she would still be here."  
  
"But..." His eyes are clouded in doubt. "How can you be sure?"  
  
"If I hadn't bonded with her or caused her pregnancy, none of this would have come to happen. If I hadn't presumed that our bond alone could sustain her and give her the strength she needed to give birth..." I exhale slowly. To my disgust, I find my body trembling. "It is my fault." My voice falters. "You cannot keep her away from me because of a mistake."  
  
He bows his head.  
  
"I've felt your heart, Vegeta, and I know you speak sincerely. I'll bring her back to you, but you must have patience." He stands, and begins to slowly walk away. "It's simply a matter of time..." He pauses and turns back to me. "But you, my friend, must rediscover yourself .... for without her, you are truly lost."  
  
I watch silently as he leaves. I know am alone for now, with only my son and daughter to accompany me. And yet all I can really think of, is how much I wish I were dead. 


	8. Part Three: Concluded

AN: Final chapter, after this, only epilogue left. Enjoy.  
  
I do not own or make a profit of the DBZ franchise. I do believe that the honor of creating such a show, manga, etc. is of Akira Toriyama. DBZ is a trademark of TOEI Animation (says on the label of DBZ videos) and licensed by FUNimation. So from all that legal stuff, you can conclude that I DO NOT own this stuff....I just get a kick of out using their characters for entertainment purposes. So please, do not sue.  
  
*How sad it is to hear thee cry.  
The stains upon your cheek bring mercy.  
I bring the gift of not demise, but fulfillment.  
  
Her touch, faint and familiar and yet strange all the same, rousing me from the imprisonment of loss, and awakens me to the reality of her existence. In the comforting ambience of darkness, her form is overridden by shadows, her breath concealed by a soft nightly breeze, while her eyes seem to offer the only light. Surrounded by her essence, I am left undone and paralyzed with relief. But she continues to move, as if nothing has taken place. As if the last four months have not come to pass and no havoc has occurred -all an unpleasant dream and the debris of anguish blown away by a chaste kiss.  
  
She smiles, and innocently leans in, as her hand comes to rest on my cheek, compelling my body to lean into her touch. She whispers, her blue eyes overfilled with emotion.  
  
"I've really missed you."  
  
I choke at the sound of her voice, softly ringing through the room, continuously echoing in my mind. How is it that she exists? My mind is filled with unanswerable questions, but as I look at her saddened face, my throat closes in and no word can escape. She continues to smile, tears drip over her cheeks and she throws her arms around me, crying with all her might.  
  
This has to be an illusion. Another game invented by the inner demons of my mind. I am torn, as part of me wishes to resist this sadistic joke, and another desires to give in and seek whatever temporary relief.  
  
I find that I no longer care, and real or not, I need her.  
  
I'm surprised when I look down to find that she is still here, and the fresh tears streaming down her cheeks and onto my chest start to make me believe that this could be less of a lie after all. I stroke her back in an attempt to comfort her, although my shaking hand probably frightens her more than not. Instead, her lips blindly search for mine and I don't hesitate to plunder her mouth frantically, all for the fear that at any moment she may disappear once again.  
  
She releases a shaky breath as we part, and my anxious hands carefully trail her soft skin, somehow removing clothes by their own accord.  
  
But as much as I try to concentrate on the moment, memories plague my mind...  
  
* * *  
  
"You know," she panted lightly, fingers running over my damp flesh. "This couldn't have happened at all if we weren't friends."  
  
I grunted, bothered by the fact that she could still think when I had fucked her senseless. Always with questions, always speculating pointless theories. I suppose that one was about us...they usually were.  
  
I followed her example and my hand landed on her thigh. Pressing casually, my thumb traveled along the supple leg, distracting her for at least a moment. But she continued, and so I interrupted her with a question of my own.  
  
"What makes you think we are or were friends?" I chuckled, and she followed my gaze, knowing full well that my fingers would begin an intimate rub. "It looks like this began with something else."  
  
She groaned in reaction. "Well, y-yes." Her hand clasped my wrist, nails dug into my palm. Her blue eyes stared at me and she paused, attempting to gain some control. "But eventually, we would have become bored."  
  
I turned, slightly amused. "Really?" I mockingly asked as my index finger pushed in. "And a 'friendship' would have been better?"  
  
Her back arched and her hips raised a little, only to inform me that she disagreed and yet wanted me to continue. She thoughtfully chewed her lip as her eyes occasionally closed, all while turning crimson as she neared release.  
  
She moaned. "Y-you aren't listening."  
  
"And you," I countered, pushing a little deeper and seeking that spot that she so desired. "Aren't paying attention." I leaned in close, as my other hand rested on her cheek and turned her toward me. "This began because of lust, the primal urge to fuck you blind." The words escaped my lips quickly, too low to be heard over her breathing.  
  
Her scent filled my sensitive nostrils, her moisture dampened my hand.  
  
"Yes." Whether it was a word of encouragement or of agreement, I didn't know. Her body became rigid, her breath appearing in short gasps as her hand tightly clenched my own. She lay still - her breathing labored - and I allowed her to recover as I found myself curious. She eventually released her grip, lips parted for speech.  
  
"Although true," she smiled pleasantly as her hand brushed over my shoulder. "It wasn't the only reason we began, Vegeta. I couldn't have stayed with you if you hadn't become my friend at some point."  
  
"How..." I paused, and thought over her words carefully. "How could you be so sure?"  
  
She grinned. "That we were friends?" She shrugged and pulled me close, her lips brushing teasingly under my throat until she reached my mouth. "You began to care."  
  
* * *  
  
I press her naked body close to mine, nothing physical bares us from each other.  
  
And yet...I am not at peace.  
  
There is no feeling of salvation from an infinite ache and my soul is still broken, untended by her healing hands. I feel the warmth of her body, her cool tears on my skin, but it is the same as touching the shell of a person - there is nothing underneath.  
  
This - my inability to feel her spirit - confirms my previous suspicions and makes me more prone to resist. I gently push her off as this new realization sounds truer every passing second - she may be an illusion, though she's one I don't want to harm. But as her blue eyes stare at me in confusion and pain comes to surface, I am seared by her abrupt presence.  
  
Rendered motionless, her pain suddenly touching my own, dissolving in it, until I can no longer tell the difference. It is innocent and unselfish, contrasting my dark grief and adopting my doubts. A rage against destiny, an incomprehension of fate's will, or that fate had a will at all - these thoughts and emotions invade my soul. But she has more than anger toward fate, she...she is scarred by defeat.  
  
She feels guilty.  
  
As if it were her fault that our children will forever cringe at the thought of her being sick, all for the fear that she may die again, their sense of security lost, all due to her absence. She feels she is no longer dependable, branded as weak. She feels out of place, unworthy to be in this reality, as if what tied her to this world no longer exists.  
  
But I know better.  
  
Those emotions and doubts, they are all taken from my own. She is in pain, but her sentiments are unlike mine. Part of me concludes that my pain came from loosing her, as that itself was a lost within me. Another concludes that this life was not meant for me at all, and as much as I've tried to deceive myself, her death proved it all the more. Her sudden presence has brought out my oppressed fears and has shown them as her own.  
  
It is more pain than I can ever allow, and I can't help but to remember the first time I truly felt defeated...  
  
* * *  
  
The bitter taste of my own blood spilled from my mouth. Agonizing lost of breath, brittle soreness of my bones, muscles worn, energy drained. My inability to fight back reduced me to tears. The frustration of learning that my life had been meaningless and my goal untouchable, shattered my pride.  
  
I lost the will to fight.  
  
My life had always been molded by the hands of others and never myself. The legend. My legend. Handed down by my father, my salvation from insanity. The legend gave my existence value, it was the tool that would help me avenge my exterminated race. And when the legend became reality, I would feel the power that had been denied to me for far too long. I would have control. And I would defeat Frieza.  
  
It was all I could think about - my unquestionable desire. To Frieza, it was child's play, and he allowed me to believe that I had finally reached my goal. He allowed me to believe that I could finally be free. So close, my mind and body felt a fleeting moment of joy, before the peace and redemption I had sought my entire life were ripped from my hands.  
  
His sadistic grin of pleasure, his taunting laughs, the childish delight in his eyes. I discovered my life's work had been in vain and there was nothing left to do. I lost hope before I even knew I had it and I lost whatever tied me to my existence. It was when my defeat truly began.  
  
And I died before Frieza even touched me.  
  
* * *  
  
"I don't belong here." The words tumble out of my lips before I can prevent them, and the truth in these words hang heavy in the air.  
  
"Wh -"  
  
I grab her before she has a chance to finish, pressing her body tightly to mine while covering her mouth. She needs to hear this. And I must express the thoughts that have been tearing at my mind and greedily devouring my soul. At all costs, it must be said. I pull her closer, willing her to be calm. In a moment, she is still, although her trembling does not stop. She is scared. So am I.  
  
"Did you ever wonder why you became pregnant in the first place?"  
  
She nods, clutching my arm tensely.  
  
"I wanted you to be happy."  
  
Her blue eyes widen in bewilderment, more tears appear and roll over my hand.  
  
"I saw the look in your eyes when Gohan's mate brought their child over and placed her in your arms. I never thought you were... being deprived."  
  
I stiffen at her muffled gasp, chest heaving, body shaking. I swallow.  
  
"I wanted you to be happy...." I laugh bitterly, startling her into silence. "Look at you. Look at how well that turned out. I vowed that I would protect you and now I know I'm not fit for it." I growl lowly, clutching her roughly. "For anything. I'm only good at pain. I only know how to hurt people." I look at her. "Like you."  
  
She begins to struggle, and somehow, escapes my embrace. Her face is red, her body trembling uncontrollably. I can easily detect her fury.  
  
"How -"  
  
Fragile, warm, the room strangely comforting and dark.  
  
"- what could ma -"  
  
Soft breeze passes through, chilling my damp flesh.  
  
" - I know it hurts, but you just can't -"  
  
Another breeze, compelling my eyes to slowly close....fall back into dreamless sleep.  
  
Vegeta.  
  
"- and what about me?" She finishes, eyes tearful and pleading.  
  
"Ve - too tight."  
  
My eyes snap open at the sound of faint wheezing. Desperate breaths fill the room, shallow...throat sucking in air, heavy exhales.... 'What is going on?' I look down to find....her.  
  
Bulma.  
  
"Bulma?" I release her quickly, finding that my arms had been wrapped around her...but not the way I had them before.  
  
She coughs, clutching her throat and throwing me an angry glare. She stumbles off the bed and into the bathroom, taking gulpfuls of air along the way. She comes back with a cup of water and a questioning look.  
  
"What was that all about?"  
  
My mouth opens but no words come out. Instead I can't stop myself from staring. She feels different. Shifting uncomfortably, she carefully climbs into bed.  
  
"Are you ok?" She looks down and following her gaze, I notice that I am badly shaking, my body coated in sweat.  
  
I blink and look cautiously around the room. It is unchanged, as if someone has turned back time. Everything is organized and calm, no signs of distress. I feel for familiar energies and everything is there...except her. I cannot feel our infant child, it is as if she does not exist.  
  
"Hey," I flinch under her gentle touch, her eyes portraying concern. "What's wrong? You don't have to freak out or anything, you didn't hurt me."  
  
'She's not real, it's another game.'  
  
"Vegeta?"  
  
'No, it's another game. Another sick game. I'm not falling for it this time. Not again.'  
  
"Was it one of those dreams?"  
  
I want to tell her to shut up, but I can't bring myself to do it. Her voice, soft and innocent, I can't bring myself to silence her. She leans in, her arms wrapping around my body, embracing me.  
  
"It was just a dream...." She whispers, her hands gently rubbing my back as if I were a child. Only then do I notice dry sobs are racking my body, only then do I believe her.  
  
I tell her everything. 


End file.
